Well hello you fabulous brave soul, you!
Welcome to my newsletter updates and welcome to my three super stealth top secret, tucked inside my heart, serious inquires only, butt- kicking, rut- unsticking revelations.
I say all that because I’ve learned -after the umpteenth millionth time of having my pearls tromped on that I need to stop casting them in the pig pen.
Jo! What are you talking about!
Simply this; not everyone is interested in what I (or you for that matter ) has to say.
Let me ask you this?
Have you ever had that experience where the heavens cracked open, profound life-altering wisdom rained down, but when you went to expound your words of light to your closest inner circle, you were met by blank stares?
I know! I mean, like, how could they just NOT GET IT??
No light bulbs went off.
No earth quakes under their feet.
Their life continued just the same as it always did, even after you so graciously endowed them with your priceless insights of gold.
What I’m going to share with you, bold soul warrior, are three gems that have brought an incredible depth of richness into my life.
Once i grabbed hold of these three little truth, I felt like my whole potential cracked wide open. From the inside out. In a good way… 😉
And the reason, I’m sharing this with you in private is exactly what I was trying to explain to you above.
Some people just won’t get it.
Even more honestly, some people just don’t WANT to “get it”.
They don’t want to hear it. They don’t want to see it. They don’t want to DO IT.
Oh, ya… did I just use the “D” word.
Sorry, my dear life adventurer, there is a big element of “doing” involved with what i’m going to share with you.
To unstuck your rut I might have to have to kick your butt.
But just because you’re here, says to me that you’re ready for it.
Rut? What Rut?
Ok, so its not fair to assume that everyone on the face of the planet has woke up to find themselves where I was:
- Discontent with the first 30ish years of my life.
- Disappointed with the dreams I dashed.
- Always feeling like I was cleaning up the aftermath of a self inflicted whirlwind spinning out of control inside of my soul.
- Wanting to take life by the proverbial horns but always getting a ram in the keester every time I did.
Instead, its very possible alot of you are having pretty awesome lives as a whole.
I mean, my life wasn’t an entire shambles, either.
At least from the outside.
I had been raising a great family. I felt loved. I had some accomplishments under my belt. I had a good head on my shoulder.
So,its true- generalizations are pretty presumptuous.
But if there wasn’t a part of you, that felt “Hey, I feel like i’m hitting a brick wall in some areas of my life. I’m tired of banging my head and getting no where. I ‘m open to a new strategy”
You probably wouldn’t have clicked that link, right?
So, take these pearls as you will. Do with them as you feel fit.
They are my gift to you.
But do me a little bit of love and connect in return.
Keep an eye open, I might be somewhere else by the time you read this and in the age of technology, it only takes a momento to send a LIKE or a COMMENT
And if you’re sending a thumbs up – meaning that you feel like you’ve been challenged and enlightened and can tweak the way you do your life for the better – then send a note AND send a FRIEND.
I’m sure there’s more people than just you and I that can use these tools. Lets get them introduced.
Butt Kick #1~ NIX THE EXCUSES
To get out from under where I was, and move on to where the good Lord wanted to take me, I had to stop the blame game.
“Ninety-nine percent of excuses are well-planned lies” ~ Dani Johnson
In ” Think and Grow Rich” Napoleon Hill shares this~
” People who do not succeed have one distinguishing trait in common.
They know all the reasons for failure, and have what they believe to be air-tight alibis to explain away their own lack of achievement.
Some of these alibis are clever, and a few of them are justifiable by the facts.
But alibis cannot be used for money. The world wants to know only one thing—-have you achieved success?
A character analyst compiled a list of the most commonly used alibis. As you read the list, examine yourself carefully, and determine how many of these alibis, if any, are your own property.
IF I didn’t have a wife and family…
IF I had enough “pull”…
IF I had money…
IF I had a good education…
IF I could get a job…
IF I had good health…
IF I only had time…
IF times were better…
IF other people understood me…
IF conditions around me were only different…
IF I could live my life over again…
IF I did not fear what “they” would say…
IF I had been given a chance..
. IF I now had a chance…
IF other people didn’t “have it in for me”…
IF nothing happens to stop me…
IF I were only younger…
IF I could only do what I want…
IF I had been born rich…
IF I could meet “the right people”…
IF I had the talent that some people have…
IF I dared assert myself…
IF I only had embraced past opportunities…
IF people didn’t get on my nerves…
IF I didn’t have to keep house and look after the children…
IF I could save some money…
IF the boss only appreciated me…
IF I only had somebody to help me…
IF my family understood me…
IF I lived in a big city…
IF I could just get started…
IF I were only free…
IF I had the personality of some people…
IF I were not so fat…
IF my talents were known…
IF I could just get a “break”…
IF I could only get out of debt…
IF I hadn’t failed…
IF I only knew how…
IF everybody didn’t appose me…
IF I didn’t have so many worries…
IF I could marry the right person…
IF people weren’t so dumb…
IF my family were not so extravagant…
IF I were sure of myself…
IF luck were not against me…
IF I had not been born under the wrong star…
IF it were not true that “what is to be will be”…
IF I did not have to work so hard…
IF I hadn’t lost my money…
IF I lived in a different neighborhood…
IF I didn’t have a “past”…
IF I only had a business of my own…
IF other people would only listen to me…
IF*** and this is the greatest one of them all…
IF I had the courage to see myself as I really am, I would find out what is wrong with me, and correct it. Then I might have a chance to profit by my mistakes and learn something from the experience of others, for I know there is something wrong with me, or I would now be where I would have been if I had spent more time analyzing my weaknesses, and less time building alibis to cover them. ”
Ok, so, not to ever minimize anyone’s pain or past, and not to air out all my dirty laundry; but for myself to unstuck my rut, I had to get over it.
ALL OF IT.
I had to let it go, forgive and move on.
That is going to have to be the same for you, who ever you are, and where ever you are.
If you need some help with forgiveness. Cool, we all do at some point.
After all forgiveness is not something that comes naturally or easily.
But it is a learned choice that we can get stronger and quicker at the more we do it.
If you need help with forgiveness, ask. Reach out. Contact me..
I can get some amazing resources into you hands by the end of the day.
Don’t let THAT become an excuse.
Who ever it is. What ever it is. You have to let them off YOUR HOOK.
Mom. Dad. The Teacher. The Ex. The Boss. The Bully. God. Yourself. Everyone. No one left out.
No, I don’t know what you’ve been through.
No, i don’t know what that’s done to you.
But I do know that the world is bubbling forth with people who have walked out of worse things than you -no disrespect intended- and they are choosing to shake off their excuses and accomplish great things.
I do know this, as well…
Nothing will begin your healing process faster than stopping the excuses and learning the beautiful art of forgiveness.
Having to drop all excuses will make some people very very angry. I get that. That was me.
I was angry.
You see I hid behind my excuses.
They were the walls that kept me in my comfort zone.
If I didn’t have them then there I’d be, wall-less, exposed. Vulnerable.
Yikes! How DARE YOU tell me to take down my walls!
It takes courage to step out from behind the excuses, walk around to the front and see them as they really are:
An enemy to your well being, not an allie.
Excuses don’t keep you safe. They keep you trapped.
They restrict your boundaries, when the truth is, the sky is the limit for you.
This leads me to challenge you… what excuses do you make?
Be on the look-out! They could be teeny tiny.
If you’ve ever heard yourself saying things little like~
“I’m too hungry to wait till I get home to eat, lets go through the fastfood drive-thru”
“Its too early in the morning”
“I can’t work out, I’m too tired”
“I want to pay off my credit card . But I can’t wait. I need this purchase right now because……”
“I would but…..”
“I know, but…”
“I was going to get that done but….”
Your excuse will justify all the reasons something can’t be done, and it will often disguise itself as thoughtful caution.
Is it caution? Or is it permission to be plain old lazy and play it safe?
Another way to recognize an excuse is that it so often sound like complaining.
So if you are hearing alot of complaining coming out of your mouth, go ahead, do a little back tracking.
Ask yourself, what excuse your complaining may be covering up.
Kicking your but out of the way is going to take effort and guts to stand up to yourself.
At first you won’t like it.
Forgiveness is going to take some work.
Finding a way around the problem or situation is going to take some creative work and effort.
Guess what? Life takes work. Period.
Your goals, your dreams, your bigger, bolder, brighter you, whatever star it is that you’re shooting for, your excuse is NOT going to get you there.
Enough excuses, will be closely followed by disappointments.
When you utter an excuse in your heart, you’ve just given yourself permission to let yourself down; permission not to try and therefore permission to failure by omission.
What follows inevitably after that, is even more deadly.
Soon or later, your excuses will catch up with you.
That little part inside of you that use to dream and dance will choke and shrivel and it will blame YOU for killing it.
Your excuses killed your dreams, you were the one that allowed it, and you know it.
You can’t hide from yourself. In your innermost you, you will know the truth… and the truth you know is that you sold yourself out to an excuse.
So what excuse will you make for that, may I ask?
Some excuses are huge!
They’re the size of a mountain and not easy to get around, let alone move. I get that. Some are very very real!
Never think you need to go slay excuses in your own strength.
That is another nasty lie.
You see, if excuses are lies, then there really is only one way to defeat a lie.
Shine the light of truth on it.
Whats the truth? Well, lets discover what God said is truth and what God said you are. Because God cannot lie.
You were created to be mighty and masterful. You were made to conquer and to create.
If God is for you, who can really be against you?
If you believe that truth then there is no reason NOT to be moving forward
TAKE AWAY FROM BUTT KICK #1 ~
Stop accepting excuses from yourself and the situations around you.
Never accept another one.
Butt Kick #2~ No Fear Here!
Now if you didn’t give me much dues with excuses, you have to give me the platform on FEAR.
I was the Queen of FEAR. I could have written the proverbial book on fear as they say.
Fear and excuses go hand in hand.
Fear is the brutal task-master that stands behind excuses snapping its whip on excuses back, as excuses build that wall that holds you back.
Fear is so afraid of being exposed for who he is, he hides behind excuses.
I’m afraid of failing ~ So I believe that I can’t try and tell myself it’s because……………………. ?????
I’m afraid of the discomfort~ So I won’t work out,and use the excuse that I can’t because …………………………. ????
I’m afraid life can’t go on with out potato chips and cheesecake ~ so I won’t go on a diet because…………………???
I’m afraid everyone will judge me~ So I don’t chase my entrepreneurial dream and tell myself its because…………………..???
Fear is a coward and a bully.
I was absolutely afraid of everything.
Personally my biggest fears were judgement, rejection and failure. Which in all actuality pretty much covers everything.
I was raised in a family that practiced extreme caution like a religion, and that provided the perfect conditions for natural childlike hesitance to mature into healthy robust fear-filled panic.
Am I completely free?
No, its a process.
There are still times in the wee hours of the night when fear with try to smother me like a soaking wet blanket over my face.
But as soon as you walk around to the other side of that excuse wall, you are in a prime position to peek over that wall and see the loud- mouthed fear that has cowering behind, shouting lies at you.
So, what are the lies behind your pet fears?
Have you ever heard things like this being screamed at you~
No one will ever love me.
No one will understand.
I’ll look stupid
My business will fail
l will fail.
My kids will hate me.
I won’t have enough money.
We won’t make it.
You don’t have to put up with fear directing your decisions
“Fear tolerated is Faith contaminated” Kenneth Copeland
The secret to eradicating fear once and for all is to allow yourself to fall head-first into a crazy love relationship with it arch-enemy, FAITH.
Faith and fear are reciprocals. They are the same, but opposite to each other.
Fear is the belief that something bad will happen.
Faith is belief that something good is going to happen
So how do I know that something good is going to happen, Jo?
Ah, my beautiful new friend. I’m so glad you asked.
You can’t just shove out the fear and leave an empty void, where it use to bubble and boil inside you.
You need to fill that hole with something else.
Fill it with faith. Find out what truth is, what God has to say about your situation and continue to pour that into yourself.
The faith will flow in, and when it does, it will wash the fear out.
For anyone looking to take a faith -growing journey of a life time, I strongly recommend getting your hands on May I BLESS You
It is so much more than just another ebook.
It will take you to a place of trusting God, step by step, while giving you practical assignments and lessons that will grow and sculpt you from the inside out.
You won’t recognize yourself when your done and you will have meet with the living God.
TAKE AWAY FROM BUTT KICK #2 ~
When you choose to fill your life with faith in God
and believe what He says,
Fear cannot hang around
Butt Kick #3~ You Need Encouragement
I think you’re smart enough to know that doing away with the fear and the excuses isn’t going to be as easy as a few paragraphs on a post might make it sound.
Serious face here: Fighting up stream against fear and excuses on your own gusto will leave you feeling incredibly played out.
That is, unless you learn to encourage yourself.
Encouragement by very definition means to “pour courage” in .
You need to gather courage from somewhere WITH OUT, so you can POUR IT IN!
Out of the three revelations I’m sharing, this was probably the biggest “ah ha moment” for me.
Especially as a single mom, when you are on call 24-7 with no time for yourself.
Time is a very precious commodity, but get the most mileage out of every moment, you best grab a hold of this truth with everything inside of you~
It’s not ONLY about where you invest the QUANTITY of your time, but WHERE YOU INVEST the QUALITY of your time.
By not spending that time investing life back into yourself, you will begin to crumble from the inside out.
Get a picture in your mind~ an apple, a tree, that potato you peeled last night for supper.
Anything that appears to be healthy, vibrant and full of vitality, but that moment when you cut, bite, or slice into into it,
SURPRISE! Its middle is a much different story. Soft. Stinky. Black. ICK
The core is no longer receiving the very nutrients that it needed to be healthy and its just a matter of time before it shows on the outside.
Encouragement is like pouring water into dry ground. But you must choose to do it.
Where was that icky apple, tree or potato to get those nutrients that give it healthy strong life?
You know it. Rain. Soil. Sunlight. It came from the outside. It came from the outside and that tree reached within itself, drew it up within itself and LIVED OFF OF IT.
Not unlike us.
Encouraging yourself is a choice that you are going to have to make, because there will be many-a-day where you will not FEEL encouraged.
Let it be poured on you and over you, then choose to reach deep down on the inside of you and pull it up and let it waken you to life.
Encouragement is as unique as people are unique. How that encouragement comes may look very different to me than it does to you.
For myself, it is a day of quiet solitude with reading and prayer and a hot bath
Others may prefer music and praise, dancing, creating with their hands, sports or activities and others may just like to get out, about, and away for a while.
There may be places that inspire you. Books that refresh. People that speak words of life. Hot baths with a cup of tea. Long walks along the beach.
These may all be ways the life is poured into you, but just like the rain and the sunshine, the method is not the same as THE SOURCE.
Just as the rain and the sunshine for that tree come from somewhere, the SOURCE of courage is not the book, or the bath, or the weekend away.
In and of themselves, these things DO NOT have the capacity to give life.
There is only one LIFE GIVER.
There is only one Life Giver, but because God has designed you so sweetly and uniquely, He has also put in you alot of really cool, fun ways for you to absorb that life!
He loves for you to discover your talents, your giftings, your likes and the things that make your heart sing.
He’s crafted you to flourish and to thrive when you plug into your own special life-givers. Now how cool is that!
Invest that time getting to know what makes you tick and what it is that strengthens you from the inside out.
Take the time to discover what specific desires and interests God has placed inside of you that stirs you, and then CHOOSE to learn how to draw on it -pull it up from inside- and use its life to pour courage into yourself
Find out who you are, and begin to discover what that special thing is that makes your heart soar, then DO NOT neglect yourself.
Helloooooo! You ARE NOT being the hero by putting yourself last.
Its like trying to drive a car without any fuel so why in the world do we thing we can still do it?
Why do we think we can neglect our own TLC. Why are we so guilty of running ourselves on empty and thinking its ok
Who ever told us that its wrong to spend time investing in our selves?
Maybe its because time is in hot demand and we feel somethings gotta go, so we cut our “us” time.
Maybe it is because we really don’t believe we are important enough to invest in ourselves.
What fear and excuses have kept us from reaching up to heaven resources for the very thing we need the most?
It’s something that we just didn’t know we need and have never given ourselves permission to do.
I’m giving you permission now.
Take the time, pull strength and courage from above, and build yourself up.
Do it without guilt and without thinking of all the other things you should be doing.
Those things will be there waiting… trust me.
Build yourself a solid, healthy, strong foundation so every other magical thing you are going to accomplish will have a launching pad.
A mighty you. A refreshed you. A you that has clarity to hear heavenly downloads and insightful revelations of your own.
A you that is ready to take on all the wiles the world is going to throw at you.
Stay in a place or encouragement, that place of joy, then that load on your shoulders will slide off on its own
TAKE AWAY FROM BUTT KICK #3 ~
If you don’t encourage yourself
no one else will do it for you.
Draw courage down from God, like rain into the ground,
then pull it up on the inside of you
It is something you must choose to do for yourself.
Give yourself alot of special LOVE
Keeping these three principles in the forefront of my mind- and deliberately doing them- has motivated me out of my melancholy more than anything.
They have given me direction and by recognizing them in my life, I have a guide to keep my from getting run down and stuck in a place of disdain and disillusionment.
They will do it for you too.
Leave the excuses behind, replace your fear with faith, and keep yourself encouraged, and in joy.
Celebrate life! CELEBRATE YOUR LIFE! You are worth it!
Take the time to discover who you are, and bravely get to know yourself and what you need for an strong, faith filled life.
You will bust out of your rut and hit the high road.
You can do this!